Elizabeth Ketteridge

( ’It is better to light one small candle than to curse the darkness.’ )

I don't think there ever is a good time for a six-year-old to accidentally cause a giant green goo explosion, but Sunday evening is one of my least preferred times to reverse all of that damage. I wasn't expected to wade through green goo tonight.

But never fear, Hogsmeade, it's safe to walk through the streets again without being slimed.

To the person who left flowers on my desk this morning: It isn't as though I don't appreciate the thought, but.. well. I don't. If you would be so kind to retrieve your flowers and bestow them upon someone else - preferably someone who actually likes receiving flowers or anonymous gifts - I would appreciate that much more. Thank you.

[Warded to Augustus Rookwood]

I'm going on the assumption that you're fine and the vampires didn't turn on any of you last night.

I'll be very put out if you're in an alley bleeding to death, because I have something to talk to you about. Three things, really.

[Warded to Nathan Ketteridge]

How are you feeling?

[Warded to Oscar Ketteridge]

She seemed to take it rather well...?

[Warded to Augustus]

You should be aware of the scandal brewing in the halls of the Ministry. Do you remember when you asked me to give Will a kiss on your behalf? Well, considering I was locked in his office in a... rather unprofessional manner while Ministry Officials were making their way through the halls...

I'm sure you can guess where this is headed.

( Warded Private )

[Warded to Augustus]

I'm sorry for last night.

[Warded to Will Goyle]

If you happen to have a miraculous cure for a pounding headache in that fancy office of yours... do share?

[Warded Private to Ketteridge Siblings (Blood Only)]

I have known that little blonde twit since I was eleven years old and I refuse to answer to her as if she runs things. I do not, and never will, appreciate being told what to do or bossed about by my equals, by any member of the Purple Hats or by people I consider to be my friends. At this point, I am nearly three steps away from quitting the Purple Hats and mother may give me all of the horrified looks she wishes, I did not sign up for this to become elite Purist party where the other ladies feel it necessary to accuse my own brothers of not being worthy enough to attend a Charity Gala.

So, dear brothers, while you will all be receiving invitations to this event - because I was not about to let Moira Gibbon or Narcissa Malfoy label any of you as Blood Traitors in front of me - I give you all full leave to skip attendance and donate nothing. You can rest assured that my feelings will not be hurt in any way, shape or form and I already feel that this event is a complete sham. For charity, they say. No - it's a pathetic excuse to rub noses with the ones that they deem worthy, and for as long as I have known them, I refuse to go quietly while they bully my family.

Victor, I do have one request for you. Do you think you could convince TerrorTours to donate the scariest and most disgusting (zombies or something that involves blood?) holiday package they offer?

Too much?

[Warded to Augustus]

Right at this moment would be a perfect time for you to remind me that you love me because I am a strong, independent and slightly contrary woman. And that my being completely enraged at a handful of Purist women will only help your cover. Or that it's helpful in some way that I would like to wring Moira's little neck for comparing my brothers to the Mudbloods that work at the Daily Prophet.

Some of us refuse to let our siblings go without a fight and I will not apologise for that.

A warning to anyone going outside in London today. It seems mother nature is angry about something and decided to rain. It seems somewhat unnatural, flying in all directions as I learned the hard way but I assure you that the Ministry of Magic is working diligently to confirm that this isn't magical rain or anything at all like what was experienced on Diagon Alley a month ago.

Until it's over, I recommend a strong Impervious Charm or to stay indoors. Ladies, if you're wearing a skirt or robes, I strongly suggest the latter.

( Warded Private. )

My mother asked that I share these with everyone, as she doesn't have one of these things and finds them entirely too fascinating for her own good. But the opportunity to embarrass my brothers even to the slightest degree wasn't one I could pass up, so I happily gave into her.

( Magical Pictures - Wave your wands. )

[Warded to Oscar Ketteridge]

Forgive me for a moment while I ramble.

I have never been one to fit into a mold. I knew what I was getting myself into, I knew it wouldn't be easy. It was fine, I wasn't ready to settle and he had an image to keep up.

Now it seems like life is moving on without me. Things are getting away from me and I'm still here. The same. Nothing as changed in the past two years, Oscar. Not for me. That was fine until this week, until I became acutely aware of the fact that I'm surrounded by newlyweds, engaged couples and pregnant women. I can't help but feel a little disjointed over it all - I don't fit into any of the categories and I'm out of the loop. I can handle the sympathetic looks - I've been receiving them for... forever.

But I'm beginning to think there is no real end to this in sight. Not if the war keeps on even longer. I can only put mother off for so long... I can only put myself off for so long.

I guess that's what I get for falling in love with him. It was supposed to be fun and exciting - mysterious and likely short lived. He'd been chasing me around for some time and I hadn't given him the time of day. But then I did.. and it became so much more. And now I find myself stuck in a never ending loop and I'm not unhappy, just.. unsure. I know where I want to be in five years - not tomorrow, not even next year - but I'm not sure if that will match up with Augustus. Not if our side hasn't secured this war.

My apologies for turning you into one of the ladies. I unfortunately have a very short list of people (read: you) that I can talk openly with about this topic without lying.

[Warded to Augustus]

Humour me for a moment and answer a simple question: there is nothing wrong with me, is there?

[Warded to the Purple Hats]

I've taken Friday off of work this week, so that I can help with the final preparations for the charity event and if anyone else can afford to do the same, it would be incredibly helpful. There's a lot of decorating that needs to be done - but please, if you have a job that will not allow you to secure the day off, do not feel obligated.

I'll see all of you ladies tomorrow at 12 sharp for the weekly meeting.

[End Wards]

Packing is the absolute devil. You never realize quite how much stuff you have until it's time to pack it all. The pile I have of things to donate to charity is almost as big as the amount of things I'm moving.

Augustus, I've decided that if I'm going through all of this effort for one move, I might as well just move in with you. I may possibly be banking on the fact that this is 5-sickle-pint-night at Kelly's with this suggestion.

[Warded to Ketteridges (blood & marriage) + Augustus]

As if this day couldn't get any worse, I was just questioned by the DMLE in regards to Bilius Weasley. Rabastan was very professional and kind, of course, but I still have this blasted headache and am incredibly annoyed (read: cranky) that they have all of these suspects yet can't seem to think of the idea that there's a high possibility of him making this up. He makes enemies, alienates people and then suddenly he's cursed and we're being investigated, as if we weren't victims in the first place. Heaven forbid a victim remain as such, rather than have a lust for revenge. I have very little all the respect in the world for the DMLE and their jobs - for the most part - but I couldn't think of anyone more worthless of an investigation after all of the stunts he's pulled in public.

Ashley, if you write about this, so help me...

Victor, I'm bringing by two men and a house elf that have already been hired for your restaurant. I also have the contact information of a printer that can have a full set of real menus ready for you by tomorrow.

[Warded to Ketteridges]

I decided on the place in Norfolk. It has the largest space and isn't far from Augustus - but I'm not moving until after the full moon.

You're all going to help me move, I hope?

Nathan, dear, if you'd be so kind to help me reinforce the wards of the new place before I move in?

Oh, and I haven't told mother, yet. If you could be so kind to wait to mention it, I would appreciate it. She's been on me non-stop about settling down since Christmas.

[Warded to Augustus Rookwood]

I double-checked and triple-checked these wards so help me

My heavens. They could be our neighbors or our family. What about the ones in our bed? Terrifying thought, that.

I decided on the place in Norfolk, if I didn't mention.

After this:
[Warded to Oscar Ketteridge]

Give your wife more attention.

[Warded Private]

If this does not work, so help me, I am tossing my journal in the Thames after I have it disconnected from the journaling network so no one can read anything I've written.

What a rude, inconsiderate and unsafe prank. I wouldn't put it past the Ministry. It's dangerous. Dangerous for anyone that has private thoughts. If they had been able to wipe wards for a day, who is to say that they couldn't do it on past entries? Who is to say they couldn't gain information without us knowing it? I suppose I should trust Oscar, being in the PAT office, but something tells me this would be above him. He would warn me, I hope.


I suppose of all the things I could have warded Augustus, that was the lesser of all evils. Well, the lesser of some evils. It wouldn't have been nearly as bad without that abomination of a man butting in. Should an accident befall him, I would not be displeased in the least.

I wonder if there's a way to ban him from my journal entirely. Look into this.

Now, work. Three people this morning alone, Apparating while under the influence of potions.

[End Ward]

'Tis the season for your yearly Accidental Magical Reverse Squad warning. If you find yourself in need of one of the allergy potions prescribed by St. Mungo's, please take note that there are severe side effects from this potion, and that you should not Apparate while under the influence of it. St. Mungo's cautions you take it when you have the ability to get a full night's rest, and I strongly urge you to listen to that caution. Splinching is even less pretty than hay fever, I promise you.

Arms and legs I can re-attach, but if you lose your head in the Apparition, there isn't much we can do for you.

I wish you all the best of luck in getting through the hay fever season unscathed.

[FAILED Ward to Augustus Rookwood]

I had to leave your bed far too early for my liking this morning, thanks to work. Should you find yourself missing me and near the Ministry, I'd like to make it up to you in inappropriate ways.

[Anyone is welcome to have seen the failed ward before it was crossed out.]

[Warded to Augustus Rookwood]

All anyone jabbers about on these things anymore is bigotry and how it affects them. Tiring. They hate us just as much as we hate them, the Order has proven that quite readily.

And, of course, Ashley has to stick his nose where it doesn't belong and chime in. Because that's what he does. One of these days, he's going to argue with the wrong person and say just the wrong thing-

Nevermind. This is all ridiculous. I'm tired of everyone arguing who is the bigger bigot. This war is wearing on us all, and I am at the point of hoping for nothing more than the Dark Lord securing the Ministry, the war being over and our cultures staying segregated.

[Warded to Ketteridges, Augustus, Narcissa, Moira, Kimberley and Brynn]

I've decided that living right off of Diagon Alley is no longer desirable, so for the last few days I've been searching for something new.

Fortunately, I found several that I like.


Unfortunately, I found several that I like.

They all have pros and cons, but I figured from a purely aesthetic point of view, that I would get opinions. They're all one bedroom, within my means and located in different areas.

( Wave your Wands. )

Perhaps finding a flat that's not surrounded by the reanimated dead might be a good idea, at this point. I can only imagine what it's like out there right now.

[Warded to Friends and Family]

If everyone would be so kind as to check in, I would appreciate it. I need more wine I was at Augustus' estate this evening, if anyone was worried.

( Warded Private )

[Warded to Oscar]

I have two tickets for Rigoletto that I'll deliver to you this afternoon. Box seats, Friday evening. Reservations have been made at Mon Plaisir for directly after the opera and a rather large lavender rose arrangement has been delivered to Femie at home.

I would offer to babysit, but I have a rehearsal dinner to attend for Moira and Jamie's wedding. However, mother has stated she would be happy to watch the children all evening.

Enjoy yourself - and you owe me. I might still recommend picking her up a pretty bauble for your evening out. A few new diamonds never hurt anyone.

St. Patrick's Day reminded me of this and I wish I would have gotten the warning out sooner, but I daresay no one would have listened to it anyway.

Please do not drink and apparate. It will only end badly. Flooing, while it still has the small danger you'll end up in a completely different location, is a better alternative. I still would suggest you talk to your local bartender or bring along a friend that is willing to stay sober and support your drunken-self home.

Not heeding these warnings will likely end with me having to locate your missing body parts after you end up splinched. In the middle of the night between Saturday and Sunday, I had to leave a warm bed locate no less than 8 body parts and deliver them to St. Mungo's so that the lovely Healers could put drunkards back together. It's an understatement when I say that I never again wish to hunt for that many body parts in one evening.

[Warded to Marlene McKinnon]

My eternal thanks for the scones and the well-wishes, Marlene. The scones were particularly delicious - and I have no room to tease you for not baking them yourself, because I'm utterly useless in the kitchen. Thank you.

[Warded to Kenton Abercrombie]

Mr. Abercrombie, the flowers are beautiful. Thank you.

If we could forget this entire thing ever happened, I would appreciate that.

[Warded to Augustus]

I made good with Mr. Abercrombie, but you still have my permission to slip poison into his tea.

It's only been 24 hours and I already miss wine. The Healer told me he'd assess my injury on Friday and then either prescribe another potion or give me permission to go back to drinking alcohol and apparating.

If you see me behaving oddly - such as forgetting things, having a much lower sex drive or eyes dilating, would you be so kind (as if I could stop you) to point them out?